Browse Tag by portlandhousingcrisis
Adventure, Career Change, divorce, Life Changes, moving on, Personal Blog, Relationships, Roadtrip, RV Lifestyle, self-discovery, self-love, Separation, Sex Ed Mobile, Teaching Tour, Tiny House, Travel, Uncategorized

The City of Roses (and Thorns)

Ten years ago, on August 31, 2006, I moved to Portland, Oregon. I had spent the summer of 2006 heartsick, couch surfing, and working as a nanny in Indiana. I had portland-415957_960_720gotten out of a long-term relationship around February of that year, graduated from college that May, and found myself ready to move out of the state where I was born and raised. I needed a change, but I couldn’t decide where to go or what to do with myself.

I had interviewed for two very different opportunities in two very different parts of the country, and had been offered both jobs. One was to move to New York City and work with Teach for America and the other was to move to Florida and work as a camp counselor for a year. One would have required me to live in a giant city, in an assigned apartment with other teachers. The other would have required me to live in a teepee next to a lake. While they both sounded like amazing (and kind of terrifying) life adventures, neither housing option would allow me to bring my dog.

My dog, an old blind pug named Buckeye, was my best friend. That little buddy and I had been through a big breakup and homelessness together. He was with me the day I moved out of the house I shared with my co426074_636536074858_1349282714_nllege sweetheart, he was there with me when I decided to skip my college graduation ceremony and go camping, and he kept me warm by curling up at the very bottom of my sleeping bag. There was no way I could abandon him. I had to find a place where my dog was welcome, where I fit in better than I did in Indiana, and where I could get a fresh start.

I knew that place was out there, but I hadn’t yet found it. I asked my older sister, who had done quite a bit of traveling, if she had any suggestions. She suggested I visit her in Portland to think about my next steps in a new environment. Of course, as soon as I spent my first day in Portland, I fell in love with it. I think she knew that would happen when she invited me there. That tricky bitch. 😉

I could write a novel about my life in the Rose City. I have experienced a lot during my ten years there; the highest highs and the lowest lows of my life have all been in Portland. In a lot of ways, it has been a wonderful place to call home and I am grateful that I experienced the majority of my twenties there. However, I have a complicated relationship with my city now, as do many people who have lived there for a while. Oregon is a lovely state filled with natural beauty in every direction, Portland is a special city with gorgeous green parks and lots of rivers and bridges and art and rain, but it is not paradise. In fact, it has some major problems that seem to be getting worse. Portland is becoming more and more expensive by the month, gentrification and overpriced housing are pushing out long-time residents, beloved businesses and buildings that once gave the city character are being demolished and replaced with pretentious condos that most Portlanders could never afford. In many ways, the city is losing the charm and uniqueness that put it on the map in the first place. Homelessness, the rapidly rising cost of living, and a lack of jobs have already caused many people to leave, and it certainly contributed to my decision to buy an RV and convert it into my tiny house on wheels/sex ed mobile.

When grief and the end of my marriage were added to the list of things I was dealing with in Portland, it became obvious to me that I needed to get away from my city. So, it seems fitting that on the ten year anniversary of moving to Oregon, I left the state. Yesterday we crossed the border into Idaho, and today we continue heading east. We plan on visiting the Craters of the Moon, Lava Hot Springs, and having another night in the woods to think and heal and reflect.

Looking forward to the famous Wyoming night sky.

Xoxo,

Amory Jane

Adventure, DIY, Life Changes, Relationships, Separation, Sex Education, Sex Educator, Travel, Uncategorized

Chapter 1

I just created this brand new website for my present and future adventures in sex education! I really want to have a bunch of uplifting things to say to get everyone pumped about my new projects, but first I want to give you an authentic introduction.

After crowdfunding a three week sex education tour that took me to the South and Midwest earlier this year, I was even more certain that I wanted to be a sex educator who regularly travels and teaches and meets all sorts of other sex-positive people. I wanted to be a national educator, author, and entertainer. It was time for me to spread my legs, er wings, and fly! I was excited to hatch a plan, start a sex podcast, and slowly transition from being a local “sexpert” and sex boutique manager to a national (and perhaps international) sex ed sensation. I had been patiently training for this for years, learning everything I could, making connections in the community, staying up on the new sex toys and sex research. I had a big lovely dream of doing more education tours, traveling and co-teaching with my partners, finding an ideal polyamorous family situation, meeting other sex geeks and educators, and excitedly documenting all of it.

Unfortunately, soon after getting back from my teaching tour, my partner of ten years asked for a separation. I was (and still am) devastated and I thought this meant the end of a lot of my dreams. How could I survive on one income with rapidly rising housing costs, especially if I was planning on just working part time while trying to take my sex education career to even greater heights? How could I create a family now? How would I find enough strength to get through so many things at once, especially while I felt so unloveable? After love__out_of_reach_by_bakkus-d1cupuuthree years of dealing with infertility and loss and putting tons of hard work into my relationships, I thought I had finally found a good balance: supportive partners I loved, comfort, security, and things (sex education and traveling) that made me feel excited and hopeful about a new kind of future. Then, suddenly, it felt like it was all out of reach.

Thank goodness for my community. My friends, boyfriend, other sex educators, and other dreamers reminded me that there is no reason I can’t still have my dreams of being a full-time traveling sex mobile.

Hmmm. Traveling sex mobile, you say? That’s a thing. It can be a thing, right? #sexmobile can be my hashtag. Rising housing costs but I need to move out. #portlandhousingcrisis Now THAT is definitely a real thing. This is a major life transition…which might be exactly the right time to throw in another major life transition. Why the hell not? I am already thinking of how to use this time to transform myself and grow , why not also try to advance my career, see the world, fall even more in love, and help be a part of the sexual revolution? There is less to lose when things already feel lost, right?

I knew what I had to do. It was time for me to pull a poor person’s version of Eat, Pray, Love; It was time for me to follow in Cheryl Strayed’s footsteps, but not literally because I don’t want to hike over 1000 miles. 😉

eat-pray-love_76858

I got a small loan from the bank just under my name, bought a 1987 Toyota Toyhome Camper on Craigslist, and I decided to create a tiny house on wheels that would also be my sex education mobile. St. Edna the Sex Mobile, to be exact.

Totally reasonable plan.

This is going to be some kind of journey. I hope you come along and follow the ride.

xoxo,

Amory Jane