Read this heartwarming, sexy, sweet little personal essay written by our very own magical intern (Intern Courtney) for Autostraddle! It’s about her experiences with our Femme Sex Coven (also featured in Episode 9 of our podcast, Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane)!
This made me cry happy tears. So much love for my intern and friend, Courtney, for my community, and for all of the witchy wonderful femmes out there! <3
Episode 2 of Sex on the Brain with Amory Jane is here, and this week’s episode is all about porn! Check it out here or listen to it on the go with iTunes and Stitcher!
Performer/writer/wrestler Andre Shakti joins the show from California to talk about the porn industry and why Californians should vote no on Prop 60. Model and queer porn performer, Valentine, tells us about her sexy adventures at Berlin Porn Film Festival and has an intimate conversation with Amory Jane and Intern Courtney about pornography, body image, Germany, and being slutty. They also share their favorite types of smut, what they like about queer and feminist porn, plus Amory Jane and Valentine go into detail on what it was like to create films for HUMP! Film Festival.
Amory Jane also announces the premiere of Whoopee! A Sex Positive Variety Show.
Credits
Host – Amory Jane
Sound Engineering, Editing, and Theme Song – Mat Vuksinich
Intern – Courtney Kist
Guests – Andre Shakti and Valentine
Additional music by Bensound (http://www.bensound.com)
As always, a big thank you to our sponsors – She Bop and Uberlube!
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Content note: This post describes a minor auto accident with vehicle damage (but no gruesome injuries).
On the night of October 5th, as I was driving home from the store to my new apartment, I was in an automobile accident. It was dark and pouring rain and I had a few IKEA boxes in the hatchback trunk area of my Honda Fit. My partner and I were at a stoplight, discussing how we would decorate our room, when we heard a very loud horn and then immediately felt the impact of another car crashing against us.
We were rear ended with the other car going full speed (45 mph), so I still don’t know how we walked away with only some rear bumper and hatchback door damage. Especially once I saw the other driver’s car. Their Nissan was severely damaged – both of the airbags deployed, the entire front bumper and hood were crunched up like a 
squeezebox, and the engine was smoking. I pulled off to the side of the road to exchange insurance information and check on the other driver. He pulled over slightly behind me, still in the road, got halfway out of his car, and began to yell at me like it was my fault that he hit me.
I asked for the driver’s info and took out my own insurance card, but he said he didn’t have his on him. He claimed it was at his house up the street and said we needed to follow him there. I told him I wasn’t super comfortable with that and would prefer to at least get his contact info to follow up, and that’s when he got back in his car and drove off. His airbags were puffed out like Jiffy Pop foil and his headlights were barely hanging on, but still, he sped away.
Hit and run. This was the first time it has ever happened to me and I felt confused and angry and unsure of what to do next. Fortunately, Matias was there and caught a partial plate number along with the make and model of the vehicle. We drove the short distance home (keeping our eyes open for the other driver’s messed up car) and called the police and insurance company when we arrived at our new place.
No word yet from the cops or the insurance folks, but I am happy to report that my car is still drivable and the IKEA boxes were unharmed. I, unfortunately, have whiplash, a headache, and back pain. I also had to miss a couple days of work and take my move-in process more slowly than I would prefer, so this is certainly another large and expensive inconvenience.
Speaking of large and expensive inconveniences, as you may have read on Intern Courtney’s recent post, St. Edna the Sex Ed Mobile bit the dust as we were driving into Portland on the final day of my national sex ed teaching tour. The good news is that Edna got us close to home and didn’t die out in the middle of the New Mexico desert. The bad news is that her engine is completely shot and she is not able to be driven right now.
I am distraught and very anxious about Edna. She isn’t just my mascot, she is a huge part of my traveling sex education business and she was my home and mode of transportation for four and a half months. This is a huge loss and it creates a lot of major questions:
-Should I try to get Edna fixed up even though it will cost me a lot of money I do not have?
-Should I organize a fundraising event and/or crowdfunding campaign to get her a new engine?
-Should I focus on putting in more internal cosmetic work on Edna and rent her out to tourists as a cute and affordable Airbnb option? (And not even worry about her engine right now?)
-Should I lay Edna to rest aka sell her as a “mechanic’s special” and use that small amount of money to go toward a teardrop trailer that I can customize and haul with my Honda Fit (after that gets repaired, of course)? Can I even afford a tiny trailer right now?
I wish I had plenty of time to weigh all of the options, but I have more classes to teach and travel plans coming up in November, so I have to figure it out soon. Eep!
It is hard to not feel cursed lately; like someone has a voodoo doll of me/my vehicles and is gleefully stabbing away at them. However, I know that this is just another 
setback I will survive. Everyone likes to tell me that this means good things are coming, that the crap has reached a tipping point and soon it will crap somewhere else and only rain goodness and financial success upon me. I sure do hope all of those optimists are right. 😉
For now, I am focused on moving into my new apartment and enjoying life off the road for a couple weeks. I will be using this time to launch my podcast, get more sponsors, and work on a highly entertaining top secret project that will be revealed on my first episode. Even though stressful things have been piling up, wonderful things are on the horizon. That is what keeps me going.
Well, that and the new Pumpkin & Spice Triscuit. Call me a “basic bitch” and make fun of me all you want for loving on pumpkin spice, but these little cracker buddies are subtle and delicious and pair really well with cheddar cheese, fig jam, and pretty much everything in my cabinets. Let me have this simple pleasure, y’all. I need it.
Until next time,
Amory Jane
Hello Readers! It’s your favorite weirdo intern, Intern Courtney!
Amory Jane is currently at a kink retreat called Boundless and will be returning to Portland (and this blog) on October 5th. Since she is off learning new things to teach at her future classes, getting to know some needles, gazing at the stars, and frolicking/flogging in the woods, she hasn’t had reliable access to the internet to post any updates. So, I am here to deliver some deets to you! Here’s what’s up:
– St. Edna the Sex Ed Mobile is very sick. Amory Jane and her travel companions were driving back into Portland when Edna started making very weird noises. Her engine died suddenly on the side of the highway just 20 minutes outside of Portland and she had to get towed away by AAA. Fortunately, the team made it back to Portland and Edna didn’t shut down on top of a mountain or in the middle of the desert or something. Unfortunately, Edna has complete engine failure and will need some expensive repairs. AJ is still weighing all of her options, but is considering launching a campaign and/or throwing a sex-positive fundraising event to get Edna back out on the road. In the meantime, AJ is traveling the country in a much smaller (but equally cute) sex ed mobile – her purple Honda Fit.
– Amory Jane has some rad classes coming up this Fall, including a new one on Sex and Cannabis! There might even be some free cannabis lube samples in it for you! Details can be found on the She Bop website.
– Amory Jane will be traveling through California this November and still has a little bit of room left in her schedule. If you would like to book a workshop, private party, or coaching session in that time, give her a shout! Her dates in California are early to mid-November and she will be visiting the Bay Area, Los Angeles, and everywhere nearby and in-between.
– Yes, AJ did get the donuts she asked for. She put it out into the universe and it came to her (and by that I mean her intern dutifully got them for her).
I don’t know about you, but I am SO stoked for what the future has to hold! Stay tuned to the blog for detailed accounts of Amory Jane’s final few days of her recent teaching tour, St. Edna’s prognosis, and tales from kink camp!
XOXO, Intern Courtney
I am excited to announce that I now have an intern! Communicating on the road has been a bit hit or miss even though I have Verizon MiFi. I’ve been going through many mountainous regions and deserts that don’t have 4G, so I decided that I needed a little help. Enter Courtney Kist – Intern Extraordinaire.
Intern Courtney will be proofreading and tagging my posts, contacting guests for the podcast, helping edit episodes, organizing spreadsheets and business documents, and occasionally writing on this here blog. She is also a great cheerleader via text when the road gets rough, and I hope that when I get back to Portland, she’ll bring me donuts. (She will definitely be bringing donuts ~ Intern Courtney)
I met Courtney at She Bop after I returned from my first national teaching tour in April. She had been hired while I was out of town and I had heard rumors from the other employees that we would probably hit it off since we had many of the same interests, like singing and sex (then again, the entire staff is interested in sex and about half of us sing together regularly, so I was not shocked by the fact that we got along). We have been working together at She Bop two days every week since then, and she has attended a few of my classes and is very up to date on my life and in touch with my goals. So, when she asked if I wanted an intern, I gladly welcomed her to the Amory Jane/Edna the Sex Ed Mobile team knowing that she’d be a great fit.
More on Intern Courtney: she is a jack of all trades with a passion for sex education, theater, cheese and queer politics. When not spending her days working at She Bop, she can be found performing in The Rocky Horror Picture Show, dancing at a queer party, hiking, spending time with her femme sex-positive coven, watching Gilmore Girls, or occasionally writing something personal for the internet. She hopes to eventually translate her experience into providing inclusive sex ed for queer and trans youth, writing about sex and sex toys for the internet, producing media (video, podcast, performances, etc) for educational and entertainment purposes, and doing everything in her power to de-stigmatize the way we talk about sex.
She has my login info now, so perhaps I’ll let her finish this post and I’ll get back to checking in on St. Edna, who has been sick and in the
auto repair hospital for the past couple days. We’re currently stuck in Denton, Texas, but Edna is supposed to be fixed up and running like a champ again within the next few hours. That means we are going to have to make one long and hot drive to get to New Orleans on time for me to shower and prep before my ass class tomorrow at Dynamo – but we can do it! By the way, there are still spots left and you may purchase tickets online now for $2 off the door price! Looking forward to teaching again in New Orleans!
xoxo